The other day a colleague asked me to review and give my thoughts on their list of 10 things to avoid burnout. The last item on the list was “Know your Why.” In the discussions that followed, I found out that their meaning of that particular statement was about Building the Kingdom. However, when I read it, I immediately went to “my” why and I informed them that if I don’t know my why, I can’t adopt someone else’s or my company’s why. Interestingly enough, we realized that that simple statement could be interpreted multiple ways and each individual person who gets that list will determine the meaning for themselves.
So what does that have to do with coaching? Just like my interpretation of the written statement, in coaching sessions, we need to be conscious that our interpretation of what we hear is not necessarily the only one. Reality is, we have a background, we have experience, and we have lenses that we do use wherever we are or whatever situation we are in.
Don’t get me wrong, all of these things can be very helpful, especially as we bring our whole self to our coaching sessions. After all, it’s likely what drove us to becoming a Coach in the first place, or is what gives us our own niche. However, we must always be aware that, while we bring our uniqueness to the table, it can’t be the only interpretation of the information given by the client, and probably not the first either.
So, how do we navigate this? Just like in my conversation with my colleague, we must dive deeper with the client by asking clarifying questions and listening. In addition, I also believe that our interpretation can be a guide into more curious questions. Frankly, I was fascinated by how that statement meant Building the Kingdom to my colleague, but ultimately it gave me a new perspective of who they are and how they think. It also gave me an opportunity to examine where I jump to conclusions from other statements, body language or verbal comments made to me.
In conclusion, I leave you with this prayer:
Father, give us eyes to see and ears to hear those you have entrusted into our care as we coach. May we acknowledge that our interpretation of what we see, hear or read is not wrong, rather learn that it is a guide to asking curious questions, or an understanding on how we all think differently. May we find new perspectives and insights into our clients’ lives on how they think, feel and believe so that we can serve them best.
Maria Ruddiman is a Kingdom Coaching Certified Coach with a passion for teaching and helping others find breakthrough for personal, spiritual and professional growth. Her greatest joy comes with the “ah-ha” of her clients discovering they have the answer, they recognize their options are endless, or they realize they won’t be judged or “told” what to do. Contact Maria at consultingbymaria@gmail.com.